It's been awhile. Also, I have another blog, Squidygirl@blogspot.com so I tend to use that more. When I'm not insanely busy.|
SDCC went really well. I did signings! People bought our books! They liked the story! Eek!
We had tons of announcements at the show, including two that include more writing for me. The first is an Illyria mini-series I'm writing with Scott Tipton. The story is mine and it involves a major character arc for everyone's favorite blue demon thingy. We're big time tying all the stories together. The other is that, as of issue #39, I'll be co-writing the main Angel series, too, with David Tischman. How do I edit books I'm also writing? By being a hyper critical self flaggelator, that's how.
I'm actually really excited, but also stressed and anxious and hoping people read and like what we do. That's always the challenge.
Anyway, here's the first Illyria cover by Jenny Frison. She actually gave me the original pencils of this. Unbelievably gorgeous.
So, the news hit on Friday and I can finally say this officially: IDW is going to be publishing TRUE BLOOD comics starting in July, and I am co-writing the first storyline with David Tischman.|
It's been SO difficult to stay quiet about this because, you know, oh my god, writing my first comic! About vampires! And sex! Not to mention the fact that I actually GOT TO MEET ALAN BALL AND PLOT OUT THE STORYLINE WITH HIM and his two head writers.
Seriously, this is my life? What? How?
Anyway, it's huge, I'm really excited, and I hope everyone enjoys them. The first issue will debut the same week as Comicon I believe.
Official release type thingie, though I've seen it everywhere from MTV.com to CBR. http://www.idwpublishing.com/news/article/1156/
I've been kind of od'ing on really crap movies lately. Last night I watched Kingdom of the Spiders with William Shatner. He plays the stupidest person alive. I say that because he does things like opening the door to check to see how many spiders are outside instead of looking out one of the many windows. And then opening an air conditioning duct that is clearly spider infested. And it ends with a matte painting of a webbed town. Amazing.|
Just finishing up Howard the Duck. Which, wow, I had really forgotten what a bizarre and terrible movie it is. It starts out ridiculous and then gets really weirdly gross. The big Dark Overlord of the Universe looks kind of a like a vaginal dentata at the end. And the music!"Hickory, dickery, duck..." Good grief. But I think it's Lea Thompson's hair that's truly horrifying. Big, crimped, and sort of triangular.
Did a Twitter thing on comics yesterday that seemed to go well. Gave advice on pitches and pitching, and some convention etiquette. Think I'll make it a regular Friday thing.
Attending WonderCon in about 2 weeks. I'm really looking forward to it, actually. I don't really go to a lot of conventions besides SDCC but I'd like to. At least this one and NYCC.
WonderCon this year is kind of important to me because I'll FINALLY be able to talk about my Super Secret Project after it. Because we're announcing it. And I DESPERATELY want to be able to share. It's very cool and I'm just all kinds of nervous and happy and freaked out by it.
I think I need to re-pink my hair.
So I rented a violin the other day. Why? Well, I used to play it when I was a kid and then fell out of it, much like I fell out of playing the piano and the flute. And I decided that, with 31 approaching, I want to do things because I want to do them, not because I'm going to make a career out of it. I need a sound dampener and a primer, but, I'm looking forward to trying it out. Not sure my cats feel the same way, though.|
Oh! Finished the second script yesterday. I'm co-writing it so we sort of share the whole thing. I usually do a first, dialog heavy draft, he rearranges things, does a pacing pass...and the I got back over it, make notes, changes, etc. So far I think it's working pretty well. Really looking forward to when I can be less cryptic about it.
I've been thinking a lot lately about my sort of internal Life List. Things I want to do and accomplish. Because I'm actually going to be a published writer soon, this feels more significant. Hence the violin and trip to San Francisco a few weeks back. I want to try more things, do more things, be more open and less anxious about what might happen.
One big thing on my list is being more honest about what I want. I'm tired of sitting back and acting like a wallflower when that's not really what I want to be, and has never helped me do the things I want to anyway. Putting in the effort and getting myself out there has resulted in way more positive things in the last two years and I don't want to lose that. It's not like that's going to happen every time but I'm more tired of feeling like I don't try than trying.
And on that note, off to paint.
Feb. 14th, 2010 @ 05:52 pm
My mom's been in town since Tuesday and it's been lovely. She goes home tomorrow (sad) but I've taken her to the beach, up to L.A. today, and likely the beach again tomorrow. It's been hectic but good.|
This week I got to San Francisco. SO EXCITED. The drive is going to be long, but, I'm meeting Rachel and we're going to craft out little hearts out once we get there.
Been a little lax in the painting department lately, but, I turned in my first script about two weeks ago...eek! I am a real writer! Eek! Hopefully that will continue to go well. It's very weird and strange and awesome and anxious.
Therapy is still going well. It was a little awkward explaining things to my mom, but I think she gets it a bit more now. Insomuch as she can. She doesn't really get ED's and I don't expect her to. I just want to help her understand me and what I need so we can avoid unpleasant conversations.
The past year has been really eye-opening for me, and largely positive. A few hiccups, like dissolved friendships...but that's life. I honestly can't feel badly about taking risks and being myself more. Being honest and doing what's I know I need to, even if it means some folks don't get it or resent it.
Anyway, I'm not a big V day person, but love to all. Hope you're all happy and healthy and with those you care about having a good time. ::big internet hugs::
|» Other Magic Stuff|
It's always funny when people at random local locations mention when I've changed my hair color. I was at the grocery store and one of the cute little college girls, with very bleached hair, said "Oh, it's purple now!" In retrospective, it's also fairly amusing that I assumed she meant my hair. |
I guess there's a "trend" of unnaturally "gray" hair going on fashion right now. Unnatural, mind you, which really means bleached to fuck hair with either blue or purple toning. It's like little old lady hair, only on trendy 20 somethings. Since I am old (30!) this is apparently not an appropriate look for me. I shit you not, I actually read that in one of the articles on it. It actually had someone pondering whether Kate Moss was "too old" for fake gray hair. Think about that again. Too old. For fake. Gray. Hair.
The world? It is hilarious sometimes.
Stayed home today with some minorish...something. Possibly food poisoning or something stomach related. In other words, gross.
The weekend itself was a lot of fun. Went up to Irvine to a friend's signing at a small, but awesome little shop. Went out for dinner and chatted about comics. Naturally. I always get the impression that we could solve all the industries problems in a few dinners if you just got a bunch of the super smart, indie, awesome folks I know.
My mom is visiting in just a little over a week! And then I'm going to San Franciso to see Rachel and make things! Eeeeeh! This month is going to be nuts.
The Princess Bride is on. Must. Watch.
|» Friendships Need Tending|
Due to recentish events, I've been thinking about friendship a lot. What it actually means to me. What my "rules" are, because we all have them. What my expectations of a friend are, and what they can expect from me. What does and does not constitute a friendship severing act, etc.|
In the end, I could only really come up with two "rules". Ones that, interestingly, I have had and felt very strongly about since I was roughly 13 or so. A time at which friendships were few and tumultuous and often fleeting. I always think of that quote from Stand By Me "Sometimes friends come in and out of your life like busboys in a restaurant." as one of the truest things anyone has ever said. And it's not just adolescence, it's throughout your life. Sometimes friendships are based on transient comraderie tied to specific events, sometimes they're tied to another person (usually via dating) and end when that relationship does. Sometimes it's proximity. Sometimes it's that odd immediate connection that's fairly rare. Or as my friend Ian put it "There's no term for the feeling of old friends who have just met."
And some friendships run their course, only you may not know it, and all that really keeps you referring to each other as friends is nostalgia. Those can be tough.
So anyway, my rules. They are, rather simply:
1. If/when there's an argument or disagreement, friends should refrain from using personal information they know about a person as a way to attack them. No matter how hurt you are, it's not okay to bring up someone's alcoholic mom, or past pdepression, or wife trouble, or whatever other emotional buttons you have access to because of your friendship, in a hurtful way. No one is entitled to do that to someone else and it's a complete dealbreaker for me. And most of the time I've seen it used, it's been totally irrelevant anyway. So it's just being done to hurt.
2. Disclosing personal information about a friend to others after you've had a fight, disagreement, or basically "talking about them behind their backs" in that HS type of way. Unless you're worried about someone's well being, like they're suicidal or engaged in destructive behavior, this isn't okay either. Friends tell each other, to their faces, when they're upset or annoyed and discuss it. If you're talking about someone to others in a negative way, things you wouldn't say to them, then you're probably not really friends. I'm not talking about the occasional irritation with a friend, that's normal. I'm talking more about the, nice to your face crappy to your back, type of thing.
I don't really think either of these are especially weird or out there. I don't think friends always agree. I don't think they should have to like the same things, or watch every word they say, or never be cranky with one another. That would be impossible and weird, just like any relationship. Although I wonder if I should add "Don't go to your friend's spouse to complain about them or send novel length hatemails instead of dealing with your issue". That seems to be something a few people need to stop.
I do think friends should be encouraging of one another. Aware of each others foibles. There when someone needs it, whether it's listening or driving around or being a shoulder to cry on, or occasionally kicking a butt into action. But overall, friendship is based on caring about and liking the other person as they are. Even when they annoy you. If you don't, then you're not really friends. To me, anyway.
There are, of course, levels of friendship. Not everyone I call a friend knows what my family is like, or details about my marriage, or my childhood. I don't tell co-workers about my ED, but I still consider several of them friends. We all choose what parts of ourselves we are willing to make vulnerable and to who. Which is why it hurts so much when that is not respected or thrown back in your face. I've had people do this and I just completely shut down when it happens. I don't have any interest in continuing any friendship where the other person feels entitled to do that. It's just not worth it to me. This has caused me some grief in the short term, but I ultimately think it's better for everyone in the long run.
As I often say, I'm far from perfect. I'm not always a great friend, I talk too much, I can be very self-centered, etc. But every major falling out I've ever had with friends has come from one of those two things happening. And though I'm not nice when I'm angry, I'm relatively sure I've never done any of those to someone no matter how angry I was. No matter how tempting or true or justified it might have been/seemed.
This is not to say I'm always right, or handle everything well, or anything like that. It's just that I think we all have internal "rules" that we sometimes don't articulate, or maybe even know how. But now I have. And it feels good to say.
|» The "Real" Me|
Productive weekend so far. New painting done, another one underway. It's an extremely silly little thing that I'm doing because I can. But I just had to paint a cupcake. It just needed to be done. |
Thinking about organizing a life drawing class...I'm so rusty in that department. I hate the idea of stagnating.
Feeling a bit tired, but, I'll live. Also trying to figure out how/if I want to address some really ridiculous personal stuff with some now lapsed friends. On the one hand, it would probably feel good to get it out of my system. On the other, I hate drama and have no interest in stirring anything up. I'm just really fed up with people being incredible hypocrites.But since they are, it's pretty much an impossibility that anything I say will register, so what's the point? Unless it's because I need to say it, there's not much use in it.
Still, I've come to a point in a my life where I just don't want to bother most of the time. I've been really lucky and have mostly supportive, mutually encouraging, engaged, and awesome friends. A lot of issues that I think I've had lately have been mostly the result of participating in relationships that were over a long time ago. Nostalgia isn't really a solid basis for friendships. And I can't hang on to things that have run their course. Especially not when people who are supposedly friends resort to using personal information every time they feel slighted. It's so high school it makes my teeth hurt.
The constant assertion that having a personal connection to something makes you incapable of reason is something I'm just done with. It's a stupid argument and I don't have the energy to participate. Life is too short to have to wonder if people are holding grudges over different tastes in TV shows or thinking you're "cute" for having thoughts and expressing them. It's just silly.
Also, in case anyone is still reading...this is my journal. I write in it when I have something to write about. Sometimes it's personal, sometimes it's critical, sometimes it's angry, sometimes it's silly. But whatever it is, it is not a substitute for me the person. It is not the sum total of who I am or what I think or what I do. It's just an outlet for some thoughts when I have them and choose to share them. Not all my thoughts. Not every thought. If you read this and conclude that you know me entirely, or that it's somehow a proxy for actual conversations IRL, then that's your prerogative. But it's not really reality.
Just, you know, thought I'd mention that.
|» Like, Whoa, Happy New Year|
Well. So far, it's been a pretty eventful new year for me. |
It probably isn't a big deal to some folks, but I've gotten a lot of positive feedback on various projects I'm working on lately. This is, in all ways, good. It's just not something I'm used to. So I find I'm struggling with it a little. Because while I'm starting to actively put myself out there more and more, and so far it's been very encouraging, there's still that little voice somewhere in the back being all negative and scared and freaked out at the prospect of Being Noticed. I want to be, but it still makes me nervous. What if I screw up? What if it's all a fluke?
And really...what if it is? It's still worth doing. It's still worth trying and doing and making that effort. For once, I'm not talking about doing these things...I'm really doing them. And it feels -good-.
Take my recent paintings. Sold one officially with another pending. Working on some new ones. I'm also finalizing a script outline for a Project That Cannot Be Discussed Yet. Which is very cool. And just in general getting myself and my work Out There in a way I never have before.
Obviously I've posted my work here before, but it's always been in a kind of soft, quiet, please don't notice this, sort of way. It's not that I don't like my own work. It's just that...I separate that from it being liked by others. Going to art school with people like James Jean made me feel really inadequate in my own work, because let's face it, if you compare your work to someone like that it's going to come up wanting. But that's the thing. Why compare. There's room for all kinds of styles and levels of ability and aesthetic choices and preferences. Time to get over it.
So, expect more paintings and things in the coming weeks. And probably some more stories and other various creative things. I feel a little overwhelmed, but frankly, I'll deal. I'd rather be overwhelmed and doing things I want to be doing than feeling overwhelmed because I'm not.
|» New Art!|
I did a bunch of new paintings over the past week and finally took pics so I could share. All acrylic, and a lot of fun. Yay for artyness!||